5 myths about living in Ubud

Liz Gilbert’s Eat Pray Love brought a spotlight to a little jungle town called Ubud, and with it came a new herd of tourists – the soul searching urbanites. Not to be confused with the yogis/vegans/new age artistes who had started coming to Ubud way back when. It’s quite easy to identify the newly arrived flock by their still very much apparent attachment to their shiny gadgets – or (heaven forbid) their selfie-taking ways. Regardless of which group one identifies with in the end, every Ubud transplant was once the starry eyed newbie in town. And Ubud – like other great places worth mentioning, tends to show that there’s more to it than meets the eye.

To gently ease you into the Ubudian way of living, we’ve compiled a list of things about visiting or living in Ubud that you may find different than what you first imagined when you watched Julia Roberts gallivant through rice paddies with Javier Bardem in the film adaptation.

1. Open living in the tropics
 

That gorgeous villa with a veranda opening to the tropical jungle you saw on the movie and who knows how many other pictures? Yes, they come with mosquitoes, bugs, and geckos. And no, they don’t care that you’ve paid a fortune to stay there. They were there first. It’s their jungle, you are the intruder. As my beloved landlady once said, “You’re in a real jungle, Cherie. Not jungle a la Disney.” Learn to live alongside each other. Spray on your mosquito repellent (preferably the organic one bought at a local green shop). Find refuge sleeping in the cocoon of your kelambu-ed bed, and make peace with the peculiar noises by understanding that the Balinese actually consider the presence of a gecko inside a house as blessing because it is believed to ward off evil spirits.

2. Everyone will greet you with a smile and say “Namaste”
 

Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Ubudians – and Indonesians in general – are indeed friendly people, so the smile will definitely be there. But walking in central Ubud, the most common greeting you will hear will most probably be “taxi?” or “rice field tour?”. If you’re not interested, just smile, shake your head, and move along.  What’s harder to swallow would be an encounter with the pseudo-enlightened ones. Fresh out of yoga class, gushing about seeing the light, while at the same time obnoxiously cutting lines at the local juice house and being snappy at the waitress for serving the wrong mix. Yes, these people do exist. Brace yourself for real life, but don’t let them ruin your Ubud experience. While not everyone is into yoga, there’s still lots of local charm to go around. And if anything, the locals would be more likely to say Swastiastu as a greeting.

3. Spiritual healers on speed dial
 

Photo: Marie Bee Bali

Okay, you might be forgiven for thinking Ubud is littered with spiritual healers or shamans with whatever runes, crystals, or tantric spells they claim to have. It’s a common misconception considering the ads and leaflets spread all over the island. And while it might be possible to dial a number and have someone come to your hotel room and do a so-called healing session with an hour’s notice, such convenience is highly unlikely with a true Balinese healer or Shaman. These men and women take their rituals seriously, often fasting or taking time to prepare specific offerings before a session. Their community demands most of their time to heal a sick baby, bless newly acquired jewelry, select a good day to start building a house, and even check up on farm animals. If they make time to see you, make sure you keep your appointment by arriving on time, and don’t be demanding with last minute changes.

4. Staying at Ketut Liyer’s means instant spiritual enlightenment
 

Photo: ketutliyerhouse.com

Again, you are not starring in a Hollywood movie. While Ketut Liyer himself is a Personality with a capital P (he does have a presence, and you can definitely feel it when you meet him in person), staying at his place means staying in a resort style accommodation complete with wi-fi, cable TV,  a swimming pool and a spa. All perfectly nice, but not really the environment to disconnect and get in touch with your “inner self.”

5. Changing your diet is a piece of non-gluten sugar-free raw cake